You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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