Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Randomize
