What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
