when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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