Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
