i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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