is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Randomize
