no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize