Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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