But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
