I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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