Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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