like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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