Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Randomize