Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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