covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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