Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
