your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
