spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Randomize
