she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
