Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
