Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
