shes about as inviting as chlamydia
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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