If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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