I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Randomize
