Hey man sorry I got all grabby
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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