I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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