Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
So much rum. So many feels.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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