I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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