Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Randomize
