turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Randomize
