franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's get the cat blown out
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize