And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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