it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
