He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
No subtext here. People are naked.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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