You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
it was like having sex with a tree stump
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
