i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
they need to just BURY HIM!
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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