how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n