Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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