I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
