Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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