And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
