I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
