Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
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