White coat. Heels.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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