we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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