I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
