if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
They have beer where we have blood.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
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