hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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