But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
